The Big Sweetie

My husband is truly the Big Sweetie...I didn't expect him to be home late tonight, but he walked in at 9:25, looking so tired, and as he was eating dinner a few moments later, he briefly detailed what was indeed a very, very rough day, after which, he had worked late and didn't make it to the gym as he had wanted to.

I'd had a tough day myself, and late on, thought there was no way I would make it to the bike path to meet Karli and Jennifer, the TU reporter, but I did ultimately get there on time. In this process, I have learned the value of concentrating on physical activity after work..it gives you a chance to unwind...I had actually had that today...but still I got home thinking about my own crap and how I couldn't wait for Tim to get home because he gets the impact of things like circuit interruptions that create downtime, infrastructure deadlines that are impossible to meet, but more than that, he gets me, and I needed to unload it for the day as I usually do.

Instead I got home to an empty house. I brought the groceries in by myself, made dinner, left the dishes and pans on the counter, and because I was beat, changed into my comfies, took out my contacs and put on the glasses, washed off the makeup, and sat down alone on the couch with laptop in lap to check e-mails, and dinner plate in hand to eat, while watching Top Model on DVR. Earlier, I'd had every intention of finishing laundry and beginning packing for our Friday trip to a friend's wedding, but once again, my intentions got waylaid. So there I was, doing what to anyone who walked in would have looked like pigging out and slobbing out...but my Big Sweetie walks in, makes his own dinner plate, sits down across from me, talks briefly about his very bad day, tells me dinner was good, and then gets up and does the dishes I had left behind before heading into the laundry room to do his own wash...at 10:00 at night...after a tough day..

I feel lately like I am very needy. I have become aware that I have a lot of support and am wondering why I need it. Maybe I am just too inward focused. I know that this journey requires some of that, but I want to keep the fine line in place. I have to remember that I am not the center of the universe. I do not want what I am ultimately learning for myself through this journey to impact my relationships with others. I want to make sure everyone knows how much I appreciate their patience with me, and their support. I will start with the Big Sweetie...because he is a good man and deserves the best.